3 Questions to stop asking Post breakup

12/9/2019

Whenever a relationship ends, no matter what side of it you are in, it is common that there are questions left unanswered, questions never asked, or questions that continue to linger even after conversations with you and your ex have ceased. As human beings, we like certainty and can feel anxious and upset when we aren’t sure what’s going to happen or what someone else is thinking- hence why we are always seeking closure when any relationship has ended. Although it is perfectly normal to want answers, there are certain questions that often leave us feeling more upset, lead us to criticize ourselves, and keep us stuck in unhelpful thinking styles. Below are some questions to avoid asking yourself following your breakup:

1. ‘What could I have done differently?’

It is not uncommon to look back on a relationship and think of all the ways that you could have showed up differently. Although it’s true that it can be helpful to reflect on your words and actions in a past relationship, if you are feeling stuck in wondering what could be different and wanting to do it over, these thoughts can become very unhelpful and lead you to feeling like the end of the relationship was 100% your responsibility. This question can keep you stuck in the past and hinder you from thinking about what you are looking for and seeking in your next relationship. Often it is the case that even if we had done or said some things differently, things would have still ended up the same in the end. Focusing on the past hinders the process of being present and moving forward. Stay focused on how you want to show up for yourself and someone else both now and in the future.

‘2. What is going on in my exes head?’ or ‘What are they thinking about me?’

We don’t know what is going on in someone else’s head. Unless we ask directly and trust their answer, everything else is an assumption. Social media allows us to feel like we know what they are doing, how they are feeling and what they are thinking- but we do not know for sure! This question keeps us in a circle of assuming and filling in the blanks- and when we are hurting, we often do not fill in the blanks in a positive way. When this question or thought comes up, try reminding yourself that it is normal to wonder what they are thinking, but that there is no way for us to know for sure. Stay focused on your own thoughts and feelings because that it what you have control over.

3. ‘What’s wrong with me?’

This question can be so common if you are the person who was broken up with. The truth is that nothing is wrong with you. A relationship not working does not mean anything about who you are as a person, and this internalization can be a slippery slope that leads to wounded self-esteem and feelings of sadness. It is okay to feel upset and to let those feelings in after a breakup, but be careful of the trap of internalizing the end of a relationship to mean something about you. Instead of ‘what’s wrong with me’, thoughts such as ‘The end of this relationship is bringing up a lot of sadness and defeat’ is more helpful and allows you to acknowledge whatever feelings are coming up for you.

6 Comments

Sheila Donnell

11/12/2020 05:00:30 pm

My purpose out here today is to share this article to the world about how Doctor Odunga helped me in getting back my EX-boyfriend that broke up with me 4 months ago. I tried all i can to make him see reasons with me so that we can continue our relationship but he denied me. Thank God for giving me the thought of going into the internet for help, i searched properly and i saw different reviews of Doctor Odunga and i insisted in giving it a try by contacting him via what's app on (+2348167159012). He gave me reason to live again and he prepared a spell and told me that my Ex-boyfriend will come back to me within 28 hours. Can you believe it, my EX-boyfriend came back to me and our wedding will hold Soon. Contact him now!!! if you need any help. Email: odungaspelltemple@gmail.com and he does a lot of spells. Once again i want to say am very grateful for your help

Michael DeBruin

8/31/2021 09:58:15 am

My wish right now is that God should continue to bless Dr Emu for his good works towards the life of those people who are heart broken. My name is Michael DeBruin and I am from the USA, it's been a while since my lover's attitude changed from being the caring type she has been to me, but later turned out not to be caring at all. But not long, I later discovered that my lover was having an affair with someone else. and also she told me she doesn't need me after all we pass through then a friend told me about a spell caster. that with the spell I will get back my woman, I took his cell number then called him and also what's-app him which he reply to me and I did some sacrifices to the spell man and he bought the items for me which he used for the sacrifices and later called me that before 48 hours my love will come back to me and now we are more in love with each other than ever. you can reach him on WhatsApp +2347012841542 or reach him via mail ; emutemple@gmail.com , my lover returned back and broke up with the other guy she was having a relationship with... Thank you Dr Emu.

Https://emutemple.wordpress.com/

Https://web.facebook.com/Emu-Temple-104891335203341

Naomi Cole

1/2/2021 04:40:48 pm

My husband and I were separated for a year and two months. I want to reconcile but he doesn’t seem to want it. He doesn’t answer my text, emails, or phone calls. I don’t know if I should go up there and try to talk to him again or just give him what he wants: divorce. Like I said I don’t want that and I’ve prayed and tried to reconcile but nothing from him just silence. Since I left he has been arrested, doing drugs and looking at porn. There was also evidence that he might be doing more. I found condoms, blood on his sheets, and found what looks like sex toys! I have also seen on his bank statement that he spent money at a sex store. What do I do??? Some people tell me to get rid of him and others tell me to pray for a miracle but how long do I wait for him to tell me. It takes two to do the tango and he won’t even come to the dance floor. I almost started thinking I made the mistake of marrying someone I was unequally yoked to but I don't want to make another mistake either, so I have been very hopeful until I was introduced to Dr Ozigidon, a powerful spell caster who ends all these problems within a few days. Thanks to Dr Ozigidon for his unforgettable powerful spell. Reach out to him for whatever you may desire to make you happy.. Email; drozigidonhenz.spell.net@gmail.com whatsapp +2349054750112. Dr Ozigidon, I will forever be grateful. I bless the day I contacted this great man.

Caterina Marvel

6/5/2021 03:12:39 pm

It's exactly 3 years now I was delivered of my wonderful set of twins, (Boy and Girl) after 8 years of infertility in my marriage. I went through several pregnancy medical trials but none was able to put me in success and I was almost giving up on myself because it was affecting my marriage with my husband gradually. I was searching everywhere for a possible solution to my problems. I prayed everyday and night. My prayers were answered by God in a different way which I never expected. During my surfing on the internet for permanent solution I came across a wonderful article about a great spell caster who has help different women to restore their fertility and most of these women has given great testimonies about this powerful spell caster called "Lord Erhun" After reading most testimony of his great spell, I quickly contacted him on WhatsApp +44 7862 133 661 and his email was also published. meetlorderhun@gmail.com
He restored my fertility after I did all that was required to perform the powerful spell and I felt the powerful spell inside me after 48 hours that the spell was done. Few weeks later I confirmed I was pregnant. I was full of joy but ever since I never cared to share my testimony with anyone because I was scared of being judged wrongly, but after seeing most women also facing the same challenges I had no choice but to summon courage to share my testimony after 3 years of becoming a mother. Don't lose hope, contact this great spell caster and your happiness will be restored with all assurance. I'm sorry I didn't share these secrets early enough to help other women who are also in pain. I believe he can also help restore any broken relationship and divorce marriages. Contact him on Whatsapp +44 7862 133 661. I wish you all good luck.

Susan Christian

8/1/2021 08:10:21 am

Hello to everyone out here, I am here to share the unexpected miracle that happened to me … My name is Susan Christian , I live in London, UK. we got married for more than 9 years and have gotten two kids. thing were going well with us and we are always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treat me and the kids. later that month he did not come home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do, i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted Dr Emu for the return of my husband to me, they told me that my husband have been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then they told me that they have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, they casted the spell and after 1 week my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he started to apologize on phone and said that he still live me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that he Dr Emu casted on him that make him come back to me today, me and my family are now happy again today. thank you Dr Emu for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. i want you my friends who are passing through all this kind of love problem of getting back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact Dr Emu ,if you need his help you can contact him through his private mail: emutemple@gmail.com or you can contact him through his website https://emutemple.wordpress.com/ fb page Https://web.facebook.com/Emu-Temple-104891335203341 and you will see that your problem will be solved without any delay.

Ric Clayton

9/13/2021 06:23:54 am

I really want to thank Dr Emu for saving my marriage. My wife really treated me badly and left home for almost 3 month this got me sick and confused. Then I told my friend about how my wife has changed towards me. Then she told me to contact Dr Emu that he will help me bring back my wife and change her back to a good woman. I never believed in all this but I gave it a try. Dr Emu casted a spell of return of love on her, and my wife came back home for forgiveness and today we are happy again. If you are going through any relationship stress or you want back your Ex or Divorce husband you can contact his whatsapp +2347012841542 or email emutemple@gmail.com website: Https://emutemple.wordpress.com/

The BreakUp Blog

3 Questions to stop asking Post breakup

Leave a Reply.

Archives

Categories